THE GOOD & BAD ABOUT SPRING

Well, Spring is here, the birds are singing, the flowers are blooming and it just plain feels good. But like everything else, there’s good and bad about Spring, especially if you ride a motorcycle.

Down here where I live in Florida, Spring is a GREAT time of year! Not for the same reasons as up North; we can ride year around down here! It’s not like it’s been too cold to ride for the last three months. But riding in Florida is ten times more dangerous in the winter than it is any other time of year. During the autumn months we get those marvelous little killers known as Snowbirds.

No, these are not pretty little feathery animals that fly south to avoid the wind, snow and chill. These are old retired people that come down for the same reasons. They drive large RV’s, SUV’s and cars that look more like tanks. It seems the larger, the better for them. You look through the windshield at them and all you see is fingers on the steering wheel and gray hair. They can hardly see over the dash!

Florida is literally over run by these menaces in the Winter. They can’t drive for shit and they scare the Hell out of everyone, especially bikers. They have an attitude too! They’ll walk in a store and demand to be treated above and beyond the common courtesy awarded to other customers. They have an air of superiority about them. They know Florida’s economy depends on the tourism dollar. There’s no state income tax in Florida because tourists pay it for us. AND THEY KNOW IT!

They rub in your face every chance they get. They’ll even tell you how they support Florida’s economy and they expect you to thank them profusely for coming down here and spending their money. However, they not only bring big business to stores, restaurants, RV parks, etc. They also bring big business to doctors, pharmacies and hospitals! Not just because they’re old and in poor health, but also because they drive like idiots and there’s a massive increase in traffic accidents when they are down here. My wife and I refer to ambulance sirens as “the Wail of the Snowbird.” They run over everything in their path. Bikers are always in imminent danger. You read about downed motorcyclists constantly this time of year.

That’s why Spring is such a wonderful time of year for bikers in Florida. After Easter, most of these nuisances are headed back north. As I write this, it is four days after Easter and the roads are much clearer and there’s much less traffic, except in the northbound lanes of the interstates.

So Snowbirds headed north are what’s great about Spring. It’s also what’s bad about Spring, not to Floridians, but to the rest of the nation. Up north our brothers and sisters are polishing up their bikes, changing their oil, checking tire pressure, and getting ready to hit the highways after months of ice, snow and blood chilling temperatures . However I am here to warn you: those damn Snowbirds are headed your way! Look out! Here they come! May God have mercy on you.

This has been my Two Cents Worth. Let me know what you think.

Till next time, let’s be safe out there!
Johnny